הכרויות סקס|היכרויות סקס

I've been seeing for seven months. After getting to know each other a bit (a litter a month he asked me what I wanted out of us talking because he wanted something serious, I let him know that I was open to that. Throughout this time I felt that he wasn't really sharing his emotions (as in opening up more, he did, he let me know that he feels a bit vulnerable with me because he sees me as a good pure person, which is not my fault (obviously). We talked about and he said he'd try to be more open. A month later he asked me out. Everything was going great between us but his mental health started to decline after losing a friend to his (he felt as if though it was his fault because he hung up the phone too quickly). A couple a months later he became a bit distant, we were still talking and seeing each other but not as much. There are times that he would get drunk sometimes and text me saying that he wishes that he was better so that he could truly be with me, he wants to be a good man for me but he doesn't see himself as that man right now and that he wishes he could be there for me and that he's trying and really loves me (this hurt my feelings because he's hurting and stuff), he wants to be a better son, etc. He let me know that he was struggling with his mental health. Eventually we had sex and every now and then we would have sex (we've only had sex a handful of times). A few months ago he tried to commit. We were talking as normal and seeing each other, he even started therapy after my encouragement. A month later he lets me know that he needed a bit of space and that he'd be texting me periodically because he really wants to focus on his mental health, he was thinking about going on mental health retreats, rehab, etc.

He would text me every week asking how I am and stuff (just checking up), at some point he would then ask me for sex these times he would text where I would tell him no. I ended up telling him to no longer ask me because it felt messed up because we're technically on a break, he respected that. When talking throughout those times I would ask him like what are we doing because these few times he asks for sex makes me feel that's all he want me for, he would tell me that's not the case and he didn't realize that's how it seemed and that's he's sorry.
During those check ups I would tell him that my feelings are hurt because he texts me and then randomly stops. I ask him if he even wants a relationship, etc. He says he does want a relationship but to talk about the other things I send are a bit overwhelming right now but he hears what I'm saying. This is what happens a few times. I'm constantly sad after he talking to him because it only lasts a few days before he stops replying or texting.
This time I was sad because I want to talk to him more of course. And I ended up having sex with someone else, l cried and cried when I got home, I showered and tried to scrub him off of me because I just felt so guilty.
I really do love him but it's like how could I even say that after sleeping with someone else.
I'd like to make it work this guy, any advice? Please don't be rude and mean.
(I've been on other threads and everyone tells me that I feel this way because I really like and care for this guy but we aren't together and he obviously doesn't care about me and just wants sex:/ I never put context of our relationship in the other threads and wanted to do it now even if I get the same response, I get it.)